27. Mike Z.
The waitress removed our half eaten breakfasts. It was printed in black and white on the place mat. Among 30+ other proverbs we both the saw same one at the same time. It changed our lives forever. “Happiness is a choice”
posted by B Kiddo | 1:20 PM
14 Comments:
I like this a lot. The changed lives. Four words! Thanks.
thanks... Those four words have come in handy during many trying times... once you believe them they work!
If they really work, how come so many trying times? I mean, is there a shelf life for the effect of the believing or statute of limitations on the words affectiveness?
;-)
four very true words.
No shelf life... In the midst of no power for days and broken heating pipes tend to forget every now and then. The forgetfulness never lasts long.
In any event
If happiness is a choice
logicaly it must be chosen
from another state of mind.
And
What about spontaneous happiness, happiness for no damn reason, which is the best kind?
Nah, don't buy it.
Sounds more like repression to me
and makes being happy seem pretty depressing.
Spontaneous happiness happens all the time. Happiness being a choice comes when there are influences that try to intrude. Happiness comes in many colors and flavors and I do not believe that one single person can define or even explain it or limit it.
LOL
So now you're saying
- happiness is sometimes a choice-
Which is not the same as "happiness IS a choice." And now you're up to five words.
Or your saying
-happiness is choice when conditions intrude- which is six words.
On the other hand, you also go on saying that
-happiness can't be defined, occurs spontaneously =or without a choice= all the time and is virtualy unlimited since it comes in so many tastes and hues-
but that's probably too many words to fit in on a place mat, huh?
;-)
Too funny
my vote goes to the original - happiness IS a choice
even when we're mired in life's challenges, we can still choose how to feel about being there
we can be happy for our blessings, or we can focus on the trials and tribulations and catastrophes
... this coming from someone who spent more than forty years figuring out that what you focus on in your mind is exactly what you see
... not to say "rose-colored glasses are the way to go", but to say "it doesn't hurt to remember all those things that are precious to you, ESPECIALLY during the dark and trying times". It gives us something to reach towards, instead of something to shy away from, or something we're trying to escape, or something we're trying to survive. It gives us something real to look at and appreciate.
my two cents ... all done now
If that's true it still implies that in order for happiness to be experienced it must be chosen from the more basic state of being unhappy.
Second and more subtly; it implies that happiness is an object of experience/choice/memory, temporary and vulnerable to circumstance and forgetfullness, rather than our inherent state from/in which unhapiness is experienced.
And finally and most insideously; that unhappiness comes unbidden compared to happiness which can or cannot be chosen. This places responsibility for unhappiness outside ourself, sets up all kinds guilt and victim dramas.
Choosing hapiness in the midst of the crap merely offers a momentary psycho-emotional respite. Which is cool, yet utlimately unsatisfying. In other words it makes happiness the equivilent of a martini after work. I'm all for gratitude though...and I certainly agree that percption shapes experience, but crtainly not reality.
Which is why in my mind "happiness is a choice" is completely upside down perception. It would be more productive and valuable to me to assume happiness as the more basic or natural underlying state, niether a choice or an effect, and that UNhappiness is a choice we make or not(if there even is such a thing as choice)based on the perception of circumstance, of desires fullfilled or not etc...for taking happiness so seriously.
In this context unhappiness is something you can actually do something about, not chose to leave it behind or to try and escape from it when it seems to intrude (by it's own choice?) just to come around again in one form or another, forcing us to chose happiness over and over.
Not only that, if happiness is the essence from which experience, then all choice comes FROM happiness, not towards it, which offers much more grace and poise.
This model allows happiness to be causeless and invulnerable, always present underneath it all....sort of like what people say god is. :-)
now if that's my two cents worth you'll get a lot per pound!
All it really means is that you choose not to let someone or something hinder or take away the happiness you have. It is about attitude not emotion. The emotion whether spontaneous or not can only be intruded on if you let it.
LOL
you must know I won't quit right?
This is exactly an example of the guilt/victim dramas I wrote about.
In order to "choose not" you must have already have chosen to. Not only that, you've already made the other thing/one responsible and, now, tada, you choose not to let it make you unhappy any longer as if you didn't already let it bother you, because you can only chose to not let it bother you if you are already bothered. I mean if you were not bothered or happy what choice would there be?
IMO a happiness that needs to be defended from interlopers, can be hindered by my own projections of what people/circumstances mean and which is a possession, is way too fragile and sensitive for me to be that concerned with repressing any spontaneous unhappiness that may arise.
Now I'm not saying that that couldn't be some kind of valuable psychological ploy to pull you outta yer own crappy thinking...but to say that "happiness is a choice" in a sense, not too subtly implies an underlying sense of victimhood and resentment as a way of thinking....
Not at all... all it implies is that sometimes it sucks to go four days without power. But the camp out I had was fun and I got a lot of reading done. The lack of power could have intruded on my happiness. I chose not to let it. I was actually somewhat sad when the power came back on...
I know you won't quit... must be in the genes!
How do you know the lack of power could have intruded on your happiness?
When you were somewhat sad when the power came back on did you choose to be happy instead?
I say an honest unhappiness is more healthy than a relatively chosen, preventitive strike of happiness.
cool...I can blame the genes?...but then I wouldn't have a choice, it would be genetic, like my baldness!
Post a Comment
<< Home